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Post by Dove on Sept 6, 2014 19:24:59 GMT
Funny stuff| 1 | The Chicken sword
A live chicken follows the owner, when combat starts it turns into a longsword.
| | 2 | The scroll of insults.
The scroll may produce up to three insults per day. Acts as an attack.
| | 3 | A bag the produces one turnip a day.
| | 4 | Wine that forces the drinker to sing.
| | 5 | A belt buckle that always points the wearer north (as if super magnetic or something)
| | 6 | A seed that grows a sword.
| | 7 | A coin that always lands heads.
| | 8 | The Bag of Scolding. It functions just like a Bag of Holding but if it doesn't like the item you've put in, it spits the item out and berates you.
| | 9 | A crystal ball that provides the user a vision of something random and irrelevant going on in the world
| | 10 | A flying saucer. It follows you around and keeps a cup of tea perpetually warm ready to be drank at any time.
| | 11 | Boots of Slipperiness - when a command word is spoken the soles of the boots exude Oil of Slipperiness, the most friction-free magical substance known to man. Someone with truly amazing Balance and Tumble skills can actually use these boots to move (downhill) with blinding speed
| | 12 | A shield that screams in pain when struck
| | 13 | An axe with a loose head, sometimes launching it backwards
| | 14 | Squeeky shoes of speed
| | 15 | The horn of ass. Summons an invincible immortal donkey for you to purchase 1 item from once a month no matter where you are. Only problem is the mouthpiece of the horn tastes like... Well, ass. The horn really helps them out of situations theyre not prepared for
| | 16 | Healing darts
Long distance healing method for any class
| | 17 | The goblet of neutrality - any liquid placed into the goblet gets turned into water
| | 18 | Force staff-The user can push a target or themselves in the direction they are facing 10ft. The target can attempt a fort save.
| | 19 | Ring of Doubt: Causes the wearer to doubt whether or not the ring is magical.
| | 20 | Cleats of Stopping: Pretty much spiked Immovable Rods attached to boots, can be activated whenever the wearer desires.
| | 21 | Amulet of Cleavage: Exactly what you'd expect.
| | 22 | Stone of final secrets. Will randomly divulge one thing you did not know of a person after they died that it determines interesting. Usually useless. It is a stone after all and stones find different things interesting than living beings.
| | 23 |
Summoning stone of Steve the litch. Throw the stone and depending on the die it will turn into either a limb or an entire litch. It does damage equivalent to the weight of the limb or full body of a litch being thrown at an enamie. The stone immediately returns to it normal state after coming to a rest.
| | 24 | Ring of instant Telaportation. Upon wearing the finger it was placed on is instantly telaported one mile away in a random direction.
| | 25 | The Helm of Forgetfulness: a plain looking iron helmet that apon being put on deals 1 damage and falls off, making the wearer forget what it does.
| | 26 | A flaming sword that has been possessed with the soul of a Fire Genasi (It was easier that way!) and is unbelievably impatient to get into battle and burn things, to the point it might threaten the holder if they choose to use other weapons.
| | 27 | A quarterstaff that contains a compartment that turns paper into cantrips (You never know!)
| | 28 | An orc double axe with one Good-aligned end and one Evil-aligned end (I got bored and started thinking about balance and stuff...)
| | 29 | A warhammer that can change to Small or Large by dealing 1d10 nonlethal damage to the wielder (We need to respond to an expanding market! Get it?)
| | 30 | A trucker cap that, when worn, makes it look like the wearer is in a tuxedo and top hat
| | 31 | A bag of infinite cucumbers
| | 32 | A cock ring, worn by the Eladrin in our party who is constantly nude. Each turn he rolls a d6 and depending on the number he rolls, a different spell is performed
| | 33 | A magical gold coin that always lands on heads
| | 34 | A glass eye that when placed on a flat surface, will rotate to point north
| | 35 | A prismatic ring that allows the wearer to change the color of the fire magic he casts as he pleases
| | 36 | A (really) huge sapphire. Happens to be cursed to cause anyone performing an appraisal on it to believe it is worth 1 gold. I'm probably going to have it shatter if the players remove the curse
| | 37 | Gloves of Offense. The Gloves of Offense are a cursed item, once worn they must be taken off after a day of use. If they are not taken off, the gloves curl into fists and no items may be used. Once taken off, you must slap the creature nearest to you.
| | 38 | The Bucket of Smoke
A mahogany bucket with runes carved around the top. When saying the activation word, the user opens the lid releasing obscuring mist. Depending on the user's magical device skill, the mist either cloaks the user, cloaks the enemy, or spits out a wisp of useless smoke that smells like fried chicken.
| | 39 | magic burrito, which, when squeezed once, would replicate infinite copies of itself, a second squeeze and it would stop. Aside from being obviously good eating, it has a number of utility uses.
| | 40 | The flux dagger: This dagger does no damage to the intended instead it damages a random foe or ally
| | 41 | An enchanted violin that creates no music when played, instead talking to the player in the manner of someone on the phone. It knows occasional useful information.
| | 42 | Brick of surprise. A literal brick with the word surprise engraved on it. When thrown it has an equal chance to hit any combatant, ally or enemy. it deals 2d6 damage to whomever it hits.
| | 43 | A Gatling gun of wands of magic missile. It shoots the wands and upon impact the wands break, releasing all 50 charges on whatever was hit.
| | 44 | Cursed Gnomish Google of All Seeing
Basically, once you put them on you can't take them off (if you don't know how) There are 6 small gem buttoms on each sides and all of them can either be pushed or rotated. You obviously need the manual to make them work properly.
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